The Gates Family

An Introduction to Our Family
The process of looking for a child care provider has led me to write this description of our family. A website can only show so much, a picture or two, and answers to some basic questions. But it can't help to paint a picture of who we really are. And with so much of this process being long distance, I felt compelled to try and explain our history and philosophy. Kind of a pre-interview, "get to know you" letter.

I should start by saying that we are a wonderful and unusual family. My husband and I have been married for almost 12 years, but together for 20 years. I can honestly say that I know of no one that has a better marriage than we do. We are absolutely head-over-heels in love with each other. And we also spend almost 24 hours a day together, so that's really saying something!

I (Samantha, mom) am a very type A personality. I am incredibly loyal and generous to the few people that are within our circle of friends. Creativity and "do-it-yourself" are big parts of my personality. The most important part of my life is my husband and children and their continued happiness. I am also very much the organizer of the house. I am the one putting clothes away at midnight and getting everything ready for the next day, keeping track of appointments or buying presents for an upcoming kid's party. I have worked very hard to get our home organized so that we have a chaos-free environment (as much as possible).

My husband, Justin, is also a very driven, type A personality. He does everything himself; he won't hire someone to do something that he can do himself (building a computer, renovating a bathroom, etc.). He loves to play with the kids and is always reading, laughing, playing games, sports, wrestling on the floor and generally just loving them. He is definitely more of the playful one with the kids.

Brianna is our first born. She is 9 (turning 10 in October) and attends the public school near our home (entering 4th grade in the Fall). She is in an accelerated or "gifted" class and does very well in school. Brianna is also very strong willed and very emotional. She has a heart of gold and has doesn't have a mean bone in her body.

As the oldest, she has the bad habit of acting like "mommy" sometimes and tries to discipline her little brother and sister (with very little success) but we are working on this and she has made TREMENDOUS improvements in the past 6 months or so. She also cries easily when physically hurt, although she is very athletic and loves sports such as soccer, softball and basketball which she plays seasonally. She has a tomboy personality (no girly stuff for her) but she really enjoys spending time with her friends in girl scouts one night a week.

Jared is our only son. He is turning 6 this Summer and is an amazing little boy. He is very intellectually advanced for his age and every day is a new adventure in his learning experience. He easily reads on a 2nd/3rd grade level and has a near-photographic memory. He can spell any word he is taught or sees and is generally very precocious. He is very preoccupied with any and everything to do with rollercoasters and games that challenge his mind (Soduko puzzles, computer crossword puzzles and the like).

He likes to play in the water in our hot tub or his grandmother's pool. We have a huge blow-up slide that he enjoys for hours on end with his little sister. On the negative side, he has some problems with pouting and accepting no for an answer (big shock at his age!), but is generally a very loving little boy. He will be going into the gifted 1st grade program this Fall. Jared's mind definitely needs the support of a caregiver that can engage his amazing intellect.

Alexa is almost 4 and in some ways is the biggest personality in the house. She is absolutely fearless and loves to climb anything. She loves everyone and talks to everyone she meets. As the youngest, she only has an on-off button with no volume control! She loves to be the center of attention and this usually manifests itself in very positive, fun-loving ways! She loves to use her vivid imagination and play games. She is very physical and very affectionate. She is definitely a girly-girl and loves Disney princesses, dress-up and dancing.

This Fall she will be in preschool 3 hours a day, 5 days a week. She has some problems with not getting her way and tries to dominate the household at times (again, the youngest trying to be heard!). We're working hard to change this behavior and we've seen a good bit of improvement, but we also know that our next nanny will need to be very strong willed to handle Alexa.

All of our children have very strong personalities. There isn't a wallflower among them. They like to play, make noise, jump around, be silly and generally love life. They also like quiet pursuits of reading (or being read to) and watching television. They love anything to do with water. We are planning to build a pool starting sometime this Summer. It will be a long project but when completed will give us the backyard of our dreams.

They all have friends and love to play with them. Each has a friend or two that lives within our neighborhood so play dates are not only possible, they are encouraged to develop solid social behavior. Our biggest area of improvement we are looking for with the kids in the coming months is their ability to interact with less conflict while playing with each other. For kids their age, they do this very well but we are looking to have them interact even better as they grow older as we feel this is an essential family-building skill.

Parenting Philosophy
My husband and I believe in attachment parenting. Brianna was born at the hospital with my family doctor; Jared and Alexa were born at home with a midwife attending. I breastfed all of my children for many years, with the later years mostly being night nursing (they would nurse to sleep). Executing our child raising in this manner has been very beneficial in numerous areas of their emotional and intellectual development. We truly enjoy our time with our kids and look on it as fun! We do take time for just the two of us but we are more likely to try to craft time together as a family more often then not when we travel if it does not conflict too much with their school work.

I believe that children are the greatest gift and greatest joy you will have in life. They bring you full circle as a person, teaching you selflessness and true sacrifice. I have learned more from my children than I have from adults. Their unconditional love has given me more happiness than anything else I have ever experienced in life. I would do anything for my children's well being. That being said, I am going to be tremendously selective about whom we invite into our lives as a nanny.

Past Caregiver Experience
We have only had one full-time caregiver/nanny. Emily was hired in September, 2005 and stayed with us until May, 2007 when she decided to go back to college. She was very loving and the children got along great with her. She was excellent at keeping the kids active and involved in crafts and game play. I think that as they got a little older, their energy level was a little difficult for her to keep up with, but she did a remarkable job with them.

I should mention that in the past I never imagined I would hire a nanny. Of course, everyone I know has babysitters and helpers, etc. But the word "nanny" always conjures pictures of someone saying they were "raised by their nanny". I was originally concerned that a nanny was better suited for families that don't want to raise their own children. I now know this is not true. After our experience with Emily I know that there are many different types of nannies and many different types of families that hire nannies. The relationship can be whatever the family and nanny craft it to be. For our family, I believe that what a nanny can provide is an extension of what we provide as parents - they are not brought in to REPLACE parents, the nanny become an essential family member and EXTENSION of the family.

Our Family Business
Because we own our family business, we have had help with our children since they were born. But help has always been in the form of grandma, or close friends that stepped into the role of care giver. Our family business is run out of an office that is located about 15 minutes from our home. Sports Network International is an event management company that produces special events for kids groups. We have a small office and I have a great responsibility both to my employees and to the clients that attend our events. I take this work very seriously and need to have the child care part of my life taken care of so that I can relax, know that our children are in good hands, and take care of my work so that I can finish it and get back to being with my kids!

We have designed a huge kid's play room at our office, which allows the children to play and explore without impacting the work environment too much. It also allows them to come and see mommy and daddy and get hugs and kisses or show off their latest work of art. Having them close will allow them to feel safe while they are getting to know their new nanny/friend. Rest assured that once my husband and I feel comfortable with our nanny, we will have no problem with trips to the park, beach, storytime at the library, etc. We will also not have a problem with days spent at home instead while we are at work. But it is also important that prospective nannies understand that we will always be as involved in our children's lives as possible. We are NOT looking to hand over our children five days a week for eight+ hours a day, only to kiss them goodnight before someone else puts them to bed. We want to maintain as much of the special routines that we can, taking care of mornings, walking to school, seeing them during the day when we can and handling our time at home in the evenings with them.

We will absolutely love to have help in this process and the only way this relationship can truly be successful is to have the type of person that becomes a part of the family, pitching in where needed and helping with whatever comes up. But the relationship we are looking for is more of a cooperative one, rather than having a nanny that works autonomously on her own.

Routines
Our family maintains a pretty normal routine of mornings getting ready for school, daytimes at school or home or the office playing, and evenings of playing or relaxing before bed. Weekends are saved for trips out to play or for a stay at home project (we have done most of the improvements to our home ourselves). Our nanny may help out occasionally with the morning routine, but that is rare. We like to handle the morning routine whenever possible. During the days, the nanny will supervise playtime, meals, picking up from school, ensuring homework is opened and completed, supervide trips out before we come home from work, etc. In the evenings, we may all spend time together at dinner, or she would most likely take the evening for her own free time to relax.

My husband and I do not go out by ourselves often. I would like the freedom to go out more as the children get more comfortable with the nanny. During our time with Emily it was a great peace of mind to know that the children were comfortable with her so that Justin and I could take time for ourselves. This is a big reason for wanting such an involved caregiver in our lives. Our work also requires us to be out of town several times during the year and we want our children to have a comfortable feeling despite us being out of the area. This continuity in their care is critical to having them handle our absence in the best way possible.

Living Environment & Benefits for our Nanny
We have a very large home in a very nice, family-oriented neighborhood. My husband and I designed the home ourselves and picked the location because of the A-rated elementary school across the street, the secluded, safe feel and the fantastic people that live here (many of the finest people in the community). Our quiet cul-de-sac backs up to the protected woods.

At this time, all our children sleep downstairs so they can be near us during the night if they get scared or need something. This should not change for the next couple years. The upstairs has a guest bedroom, home theatre, play room and a two-bedroom, private suite for our nanny. This suite has one bedroom with a walk-in closet & television; the other bedroom is used as a sitting room with couch, ottoman, microwave, mini fridge, desk and television, along with a private bathroom. These rooms lead out on our upstairs open deck with a beautiful view of the Western skies and a wildlife-protected area that will never be built on with lush forest.

Transportation will be available, should our nanny not have her own vehicle. We also have an extensive benefits package that allows our nanny to have free health care (all costs and the complete deductible is paid in full for you). We will provide one week of vacation at Christmas time and another week during the year. There are also many opportunities for a long weekend off to allow time to visit home. Obviously, emergencies and other issues that need addressed can be done so with flexibility. However, there are certain times of year where our nanny cannot travel due to our work demands in producing events. Primarily these are certain weekends in March / April as well as the American Thanksgiving weekend.

Nanny Qualities we are Looking For
The most important quality in a nanny is obviously being someone of good character - someone we rely on. Beyond this, we are looking for someone with a background in working with children. While it's certainly a benefit to have been a nanny in the past, it is not an absolute requirement. Because our children are quite bright and need to stay intellectually stimulated, it is important that our nanny also be bright and articulate and able to work with them on an educational level as well (a background in education is a big plus). Our kids love to play and are very physical (both outward play and close-up cuddling). Our nanny will need to be very playful (rolling around on the floor kind of playful) as well as very comfortable with physical affection. Our kids are the kind that need to be able to reach out and get cuddles and snuggle up on the couch with the nanny. It is also important that our nanny have a strong, outgoing personality. Because my husband and I have pretty strong personalities, so do the children and they need to know that the person watching them has an equally strong personality. Consistent guidelines and discipline are obviously very important to maintaining order and keeping their behavior in line.

In Closing
We are looking for that perfect match. Someone who is an ideal blend of sweet, responsible, smart, fun, loving, nurturing, challenging and disciplined. I want someone who has a strong enough personality to stand up to my three little (very strong) personalities, but also a flexible enough personality that she understands that she needs to conform to fit the nature of our household.

If you feel that your personality and philosophy will fit well into our lives and you think we are a good fit, please contact me via email with your thoughts and questions and we will hopefully take the next step towards a future relationship. Prospective nannies should know that we are hoping to make a decision on hiring someone as quickly as possible so we will be contacting many different candidates. If you are interested, please respond quickly so that we can speak further.